nuevo

Today is a wrench.

Always there´s confusion. It comes from being loyal, almost too loyal. Fierce is the common adjective that no longer describes the bared teeth, narrowed vision and blind hatred that come with a challenge to that loyalty. A challenge that comes as those who look for it are those to whom my back is turned, save the one who knows they have it all. But they have been the only one thus far in my life. This life of aeons that outlives whole generations, whole dynasties in but one of its years and which rolls with the tides and its somnambulic piper: the moon.

Outside flies the cry of another; one who promulgates their anguish for the appreciation of the masses who have caused it to hate. And they lounge in their cosy homes.

When is a duty fulfilled? Is half enough, or more than half or...? Choosing duty is luck or a choice made too early in selfishness and my choices have yet to be made, though they are on the cusp. Perhaps.

I do not like to second-guess fate. She knows all the variables and holds them in her hands, ready to mix them like a chef preparing a new dish, something unique and never to be repeated; or the recipe known.

Charity is fear and disappointment. A cocktail that not all will drink.

Though in a few cases, it is a reflection of ... something I will not speak of here as winter´s grasp will bite too hard and while not prove fatal will be an unnecessity. And those should be avoided where patience is a card we still hold.

I think we all like the circle that draws itself. Because most of us cannot do so. Envy, even, is a form of appreciation.

Very few, if any, of those you meet are where you would have them be and often it is those you know who are farther away to whom you are drawn - a desire to leap distances in one stride.